Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
