i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
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