Apparently you make a good broom.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
