is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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