I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize