like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
