90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
