would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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