you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
what day is it and did you see me today?
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
