glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Randomize
