Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(651): View more from Minnesota

nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent

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(678): View more from Georgia

Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man

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(817): View more from Texas

Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.

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(330): View more from Ohio

Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."

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(404): View more from Georgia

Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??

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(716): View more from New York

took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation

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(580): View more from Oklahoma

Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.

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