Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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