Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
