his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Randomize
