no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Randomize
