Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
