rhymes with "ouble enetration"
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
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