I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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