I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize