wrigley field is MILF paradise
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
As shirtless as possible
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize