Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
