Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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