Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
