And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
