Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Randomize