I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
This is the high leading the old right now
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
