yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
