Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Randomize
