HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Randomize
