Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
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