I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
