what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Randomize
