I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
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