well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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