she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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