Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Then you guys just all showered together...?
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
