I love black thongs
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
