In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize