It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
