Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
