Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I had to cum in my sink.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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