She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
