real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
