I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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