There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize
