exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Randomize
