just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
