After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Randomize