Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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