You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
